We all know that deciding on the right wedding dress is a mammoth undertaking, but the actual deciding part is often only the beginning.  Perhaps you have a talented friend or family member who can whip up the gown of your dreams, or maybe you already have a vintage gown that just needs a little remodelling. Possibly, you have a definite pattern in mind, and a professional, reliable dressmaker who can make it up to fit you, or you’ve seen the perfect dress in a bridal wear retailer, and all you have to do is buy it.

But what if you have a bit of an idea of what you want, but need a little help working out the finer details?  Or you like the thought of having a specialist bridal wear designer make your dress?  Then maybe a couturier is for you.

Couturiers’ salons can be so tempting – all that beautiful silk and tulle, the flowers, the huge gilt mirrors, not to mention the feeling of exclusivity!  Salons that are “strictly by appointment only”, or have photo albums featuring the weddings of famous clients lying around – it’s all so enticing.  You too, could be a princess on your special day.

There’s no doubt, there are some staggeringly talented couturiers around.  People of such knowledge and vision that you know that in the years to come, their work will remain timeless.  There are couturiers who are unafraid to push boundaries, who want to hear your ideas, because they want you to have a wedding gown to be proud of.  They want you to be comfortable, stand proud and look gorgeous, and they’re happy to do whatever they need to do, to ensure that you do.

So, to couture or not to couture?

Well, that depends on what you want in a wedding dress. If you look around the couturier’s salon, and you like his or her style, and you feel that they can design a wedding dress that suits your personal vision, then they are probably the wedding dress-maker for you.  But, if you have a very definite idea of what you want, of have a drawing of something that you’ve designed yourself, or perhaps are wanting to replicate a vintage wedding gown, you may be better off with somebody who is an experienced and reliable dressmaker, and who won’t be too phased about not adding their own ‘interpretations’ to your design.

Personally, I would steer away from having a bridal couturier make up a copy of something that they had already designed.  I say this, because a few years ago, I was talking to a few of my workmates about their weddings.  Imagine their horror when it slowly dawned on them that, not only had the three of them gotten married on the same weekend in the same year, they had all worn an identical wedding dresses made by the same ‘exclusive’ (and fairly well known) couturier.  Frankly, I think when people are paying thousands of dollars for personalised service and a single-wear garment, this is just not good enough. 

If you want to avoid this particular scenario, when choosing a couturier, look through all of their albums, and if you feel that what you are being offered is too similar to other dresses that they’ve made, say so!  Bridal fashion is like any other fashion – at any given time, certain things will be in style, and so you may end up choosing a gown that is similar to others, but if you’re dealing with a couturier, it shouldn’t be identical, unless that’s what you’ve specifically requested.  Many couturiers keep a number of dresses made up and ready for sale – obviously, those dresses aren’t unique, but if you are choosing something ‘off the rack’, don’t be afraid to ask how popular that particular design is.  If you don’t like the idea of having the same wedding dress as say, ten other people, choose something else!

When engaging a couturier, find out exactly what your money entitles you to – how many fittings, when will the dress be finished, is the hoop (if you need one) included in the price? 

I once dealt with a bride who had bought her gown from a specialist couturier – when she went to pick it up the day before her wedding, she found that it was unhemmed!  The couturier agreed to hem it on the spot, but it would cost the bride $120 dollars!  When the bride queried this, the couturier told her that “hemming is extra”!

Obviously, that’s an extreme case, but it does highlight the fact that it pays to check exactly what you’re paying for.

You may also like to find out if you will be dealing with the couturier themselves. One of my friends had her wedding gown made by yet another well-known specialist bridal couturier, and I must admit, I was a little annoyed by the fact that, throughout all the fittings, we were attended to only by this woman’s assistant, but when she did deign to grace us with her presence, she was so breathtakingly rude and dismissive, that we felt uncomfortable being there.  The assistant was really sweet (and very apologetic), but for $5000, my friend needed service, not sympathy! Added to that, my friend had drawn two potential designs herself, and when she asked the couturier if there was any way that the elements of both dresses could be blended, the couturier snapped back at her.  “Nope.  It’s one or the other, just choose”.

Now, I’m all for respecting other people’s creative temperaments, but not if you’re paying them several thousand dollars to perform a service for you!

So the lesson here? Always remember, you are the customer. If you are going to have a couturier wedding gown made, don’t be afraid to speak up.  Tell them all about your wedding – the venue, what flowers you have in mind, what periods in history appeal to you, what other themes you may have in your wedding.  Any specialist bridal couturier of deservedly good reputation (and they are around!) will be pleased at the prospect of designing something unique and personally perfect for you.